In a very good post at Street Prophets, Rabbi Brian challenged folks:
It often feels easier to be a caretaker for others than to take a good, hard look at myself, acknowledge what it is that I want, and then do it. Also, being "selfless" looks good.Now, this of course started a very good discussion about the balance in loving ourselves and loving others.
But, to be healthy, functioning adults, we need to put ourselves first. If not we are willingly -- and often unwittingly -- committing violence against ourselves. Putting others first is both exhausting and unfair.